Day 26 – Divorced?
It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: (Mat 5:31) But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery. (Mat 5:32) They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? (Mat 19:7)
He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. (Mat 19:8)
And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away. (Mar 10:4) And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. (Mar 10:5)
Are you a divorced Christian man or woman? If there’s any topic which brings much dissention with Christians, it is this one. Jesus had clear instructions in the Bible on this, but it seems that man has managed to put his own twist into it in order to allow divorce for other reasons than what Jesus specified. Jewish laws and customs in the day of Christ are different from what the Jewish people practice today. No longer do they practice the one-year betrothal period which required a contract but it existed none-the-less.
A good example of this betrothal period is given in the very account of Mary and Joseph. Before a couple were to consummate their marriage, it was Jewish custom to have a marriage contract where they were committed to marry each other for one year. After that one year was over, a wedding feast would occur and then, and only then, was the marriage consummated. If one of the parties committed fornication during this one year prior to the wedding feast, a bill of divorcement could be granted and only for this reason, according to Jesus. The punishment for a woman was to be made a public example and punished. A good example, again, is in the account of Mary and Joseph. When Joseph found out from an angel in a dream that Mary was with child, he did not want to expose her and was going to put her away privately. But instead, the angel revealed to him that she conceived from the Holy Ghost and that Jesus, the Saviour, would be born.
Now the birth of Jesus Christ was on this wise: When as his mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Ghost. (Mat 1:18) Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a publick example, was minded to put her away privily. (Mat 1:19)
So Joseph married her at this point.
Then Joseph being raised from sleep did as the angel of the Lord had bidden him, and took unto him his wife: (Mat 1:24)
If they were already married, why does the Word say that Joseph obeyed the angel of the Lord and took Mary unto him if she were already his? All he had to do was be quiet. No one would have suspected anything about her pregnancy because she was already married! Think about it – why would it have been such a big deal?
Jesus is clear in Matthew 19:8 and Mark 10:5 that divorce was allowed by Moses because of the hardening of the hearts of the people. Jesus went further in saying that from the beginning it was not so.
What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Mar 10:9)
Scripture never contradicts Scripture. Ever! When a marriage union is formed, God has joined these two people and the Word says that no man can separate it! Jesus said this. God Himself!
The one-year contract period (like that of Mary and Joseph), is the only time that this bill of divorcement was to be granted so the contract could be legally broken. Notice that Jesus says in Matt. 5:32 that it was only to be granted in the case of fornication. Jesus went on to say that if this woman married another, she would be committing adultery. If they were already married when she was unfaithful, Jesus would not have used the two words fornication and adultery in the same verse. Many today use the two words interchangeably but that is not the way it is written. Fornication refers to unfaithfulness before marriage – or in this case, during the one-year engagement (betrothal period). Adultery refers to unfaithfulness after a marriage has been consummated.
The Gentiles did not have this custom in that day. That is why it is addressed to the Jews. We do not have that custom today, neither do the Jews of today. However, the custom of divorce sure has permeated all cultures today. Are any of the reasons given today in line with what Jesus taught? No. Are any following the marriage contract and betrothal period of the Jewish customs from the time of Christ? No.
The Apostle Paul went at lengths to teach us in this area.
Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. (1 Cor. 7:2)
Paul states that unfaithfulness before marriage is called fornication in this verse. He goes on to say that if a person is separated or divorced, they are not to remarry.
Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife. (1 Cor. 7:27) The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord. (1 Cor. 7:39)
Paul emphasizes in this next verse that God says that they are to remain unmarried.
And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: (1 Cor. 7:10) But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. (1 Cor. 7:11)
Notice how Paul stresses that it isn’t his words but the Lord’s? Take heed, Christian.
Next, Paul speaks to the people in his own words and not from the Lord and it deals with being married to an unbeliever.
But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. (1 Cor. 7:12) And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. (1 Cor. 7:13) For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. (1 Cor. 7:14) But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. (1 Cor. 7:15)
Paul is not stating here that it’s OK for the believer to go ahead and marry another. Remember what Jesus said in
(Mar 10:9) What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
God’s Word never changes. Paul would not insert anything that would be a direct contradiction to what God says in His Word. We cannot add to the Word or take away from it just so we can soothe our consciences.
But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. (1 Cor. 7:11)
It is clear that divorce and remarriage today are viewed quite differently from what I have shared with you in this devotional. However, when you look at it in the light of the Word of God, there is never any reason to allow re-marriage. The Word says to stay unmarried until your spouse dies. Plain and simple. I know there are many out there who will be disturbed with me after reading this. But I ask that you prayerfully consider reading God’s Word and studying the matter out. Let the Holy Spirit of God speak to your heart.
If you are divorced and remarried or you have remained unmarried, you’re probably wondering what to do next. Repent, acknowledge your sin before God and ask His forgiveness. Then go on to serve Him and help those in need that are in the same boat as you are and teach them what God has taught you in His Word. God can and will use you to meet the needs of another. You would not abandon your own child because that child made a mistake, would you? Neither will God abandon you.
…I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. (Heb 13:5b)
Dear God…
I know this will be a hard thing to swallow
For those who are living in this boat
Holy Spirit I pray you would use this
In their hearts all these things that I wrote
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